I'm failing You, Jesus
I don't meet up
and no matter how hard I try
an accusing voice
reminds me again
I
have
failed.
Maybe I have failed
but not quite as I think.
I haven't failed because of my mistakes
lack of discipline
or shortage of effort.
I have failed because I have forgotten the gospel.
I have tried to replace
propitiation with perfection
dependence with discipline
grace with effort
and in doing so,
I've forgotten the cross.
The cross is only good news
because I do mess up
because my discipline and effort
will never be enough.
My biggest failing is not that I need grace
but that I forget
grace exists.
At the cross
everything is simple.
I'm not enough
I don't meet up
and that is where the good news begins.
Wednesday, June 27, 2012
Sunday, June 10, 2012
Day 15: Back on track
Since I didn't have anywhere to be on Friday and Saturday, I slept in until 8:30 and 9:00. This was the first time I had slept in past 6:30 since starting 2:24. At first I felt guilty. I've been getting up so early that sleeping in felt lazy. But, during quiet time, I read this verse:
In vain you rise early
and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—
for he grants sleep to those he loves.
-Psalm 127:2
Of course, getting up early and working for your food aren't really worthless; the point is that we depend on God (see verse 1; the context makes this point clear). This verse, however, was an encouraging reminder that rest is from God! Depending on him matters even more than being disciplined.
After a nice rest and catch-up, I was able to rise early again this morning for day 15! I'm actually beginning to get excited about getting up for quiet time in the morning! (Though I must admit, I drowsed off a few times during prayer this morning..... I guess I can relate to Jesus' disciples!). I don't have anything "big" to report; I still feel like I'm coming out of a dry place. Nevertheless, I'm beginning to notice a change in my thinking. Bringing thoughts to Jesus is a lot easier when you've been thinking about Him. I do know that God is going to do some amazing stuff as we spend time with Him, and looking forward to seeing it!
In vain you rise early
and stay up late,
toiling for food to eat—
for he grants sleep to those he loves.
-Psalm 127:2
Of course, getting up early and working for your food aren't really worthless; the point is that we depend on God (see verse 1; the context makes this point clear). This verse, however, was an encouraging reminder that rest is from God! Depending on him matters even more than being disciplined.
After a nice rest and catch-up, I was able to rise early again this morning for day 15! I'm actually beginning to get excited about getting up for quiet time in the morning! (Though I must admit, I drowsed off a few times during prayer this morning..... I guess I can relate to Jesus' disciples!). I don't have anything "big" to report; I still feel like I'm coming out of a dry place. Nevertheless, I'm beginning to notice a change in my thinking. Bringing thoughts to Jesus is a lot easier when you've been thinking about Him. I do know that God is going to do some amazing stuff as we spend time with Him, and looking forward to seeing it!
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